Garen Agymah

[Garen]

TECHNIQUE NAME: Guardian's Blessing
LEVEL: 1
ATTRIBUTE: Power
DESCRIPTION: Garen uses his shield to defend himself of an opponents abilities. If the tech that is defended against is of equal or lesser rank, Garen simply blocks it. If the move is higher the damage is dampened. This technique uses a good amount of strength and can only be used 3 posts per topic with a 2 post cooldown.

PRICE: Free

TECHNIQUE NAME: Fated Strike
LEVEL: 1
ATTRIBUTE: Power
DESCRIPTION: With a deep breath and a summoning of his strength, Garen puts his muscle into a single strike raising his strength by one tier. The slice is at a diagonal and downward angle that gives a 180 degree arc around him. This swing is so strong that it can through the defenses of equal ranks. The technique leaves him vulnerable for an attack from behind but flanking foes will still be cut due to the 180 degree arc. Garen cannot stop mid-strike he needs to go all the way down as the burst of energy is slamming the sword down. If Garen does miss his target he is thrown off balance and open for an attack. This technique is a little costly and can only be used twice per thread.
PRICE: Free

TECHNIQUE NAME: Spinning Top
LEVEL: 1
ATTRIBUTE: Power, Agility
DESCRIPTION: Garen spins 360 degrees swiping his sword at two rotations per second for five seconds, in a stationary point. After doing so the first time, Garen is a little dizzy and is less accurate. The second time he uses it, he is completely dizzy and can fall down, he may need to sit out for a post. Garen's vision is obscured however he is able to stop prematurely but it would cause him to be thrown off balance. The spinning blade causes damage based on strength but also pushes foes 1.5 meters away (About the length of the sword). This technique can also be used to counter an attack that comes into melee distance like a melee combo or rush. There is a 3 post cooldown, and can only be used two times per thread.
PRICE: Free

[manafest]

You're gonna need to be far more descriptive than "He puts more oomph into his strikes." Look at everyone else's techniques *especially the ones that're getting accepted* and follow their suit. That and the shield smacking is basic. Nothing is stopping you from doing that already. Instead, describe it with more detail. What makes it better than a basic shield smashing?

How fast is this dude swiping his sword? Can he stop? Does he get dizzy. Description is your friend.

[Garen]

Sorry, my last RP had very specific rules on the power of techs, so level ones were meant to be really generalized and a step higher than average attacks.

Anyways fixed and changed some things.

[manafest]

FIRST TECHNIQUE
The first one needs changing. The fact that the technique returns the damage doesn’t make any sense. How is the damage returned if it’s melee? What if it’s with an arrow, or gun. I don’t understand why it should be returned. Additionally, if the technique is higher in level it should make your character fall on his ass or something. Using a lower ranked technique to block a higher one doesn’t logically compute. Additionally if it’s larger than one in level, just a simple slide from the force is getting off extremely easy.

SECOND TECHNIQUE
Again, description is your friend. This needs something other than “He focuses his muscles and makes one strike stronger than the norm.” What’s the norm? The norm for everyone or the norm for him? Does his power raise one tier for this one strike? What is it capable of doing? Breaking something? Causing something to rattle? You say that he uses his strength and well makes a stronger strike than usual. It’s so wide open you’re giving the opponent so much descriptive power that you left out.

THIRD TECHNIQUE
If he starts, can he finish the spinning prematurely? Is he capable of seeing what’s going on around him during this intense spinning? Is this purely and offensive technique with no defensive capabilities?

[Garen]

Edited. Am I getting closer?

[DAEMON]

HOLDUP;

Guardian's Blessing - No. Get rid of all that percentage stuff. Its as simple as this: technique of equal or lesser rank can be blocked, attacks of higher rank are merely dampened, providing some resistance to powerful attacks. A battle moderator would deem how sufficient that resistance is based on the attack. Place a two post cool-down in the description.

Fated Strike - You're not cleaving through flesh and bone. Not with a level one technique, nor with your level two power attribute. Besides, attributes are more of a general description of your abilities, while techniques are a specific use of them. You might wanna change this to something that can cut through defenses of equal ranks. That seems fair to me.

Spinning Top - remove the part about blocking arrows. maybe in the future, upon leveling this technique and expanding its scope. however, spinning in a circle with your blade extended wouldn't exactly due much to defend against a barrage of arrows. Thanks

[Garen]

Ok fixed. Sorry when I read "One tier higher" I just took the info from the level 3 attrib info. Anyways its removed. Also took out the %'s but kept the knock back/down rules.

[DAEMON]

HOLDUP;

Guardian's Blessing - okay. you really aren't getting it. it should say in the description that it only dampens the power of higher level attacks. How much purpose that serves is entirely up to a staff member bm'ing the fight. You do not state what occurs for each level higher within the description. Thanks~

[Garen]

Sorry I have one person telling me to have a lot of description, and one person to cut it down. Anyways I removed any modifiers so that it just says I dampen the attack.

[DAEMON]

ACCEPTED!

Description is good, but we want you describing the mechanics of the technique more so than how it defends against upper ranks.